In an examination of almost 12 million documents recovered
from the Panamanian law firm exposed as a front for global criminals and tax
evaders, investigators have recovered evidence that Donald Trump, presumptive
Republican nominee for the President of the United States, has poured money
into an entity called “Trumpassic Park, Inc.”, which apparently is a front for
the breeding of huge dinosaurs that have the capability of eating two or three
T-Rex’s for breakfast. |
| Did somebody say caucus? |
According to sources that have reviewed the documents, his
investment includes a laboratory, equipment, scientific staff, an island, and enough
reptilian DNA to breed the world’s largest, most powerful and destructive
dinosaurs.
.
“This is amazing, we have no idea where the island is or how
many dinosaurs have already hatched and are maturing,” said Dean Linkletter,
C.P.A. and Assistant Director of Import/Export at Atlantic Bank, Belize.
 |
| Linkletter |
“I’m not a scientist but from
what I can see from the documentation, Mr. Trump is creating a swarm of huge
dinosaurs. There is no indication that
he is building anything more than a massive incubator of dinosaurs – no venues
for visitors, rides, merchandising; what you’d expect if you were going to create
a theme park.”
Asked what kinds of dinosaurs could be produced by this offshore
venture, Professor of Paleontology, University of Cerberus, Milan G. Marslander said, “You’ve got me."
 |
| Marslander |
"It depends on the lab, the team, the DNA, and
a whole bunch of other factors. But I can tell you this, you can create herds
of these things and they’ll be huge.
Just one of them could level something as big as a Convention Center.”
No comments:
Post a Comment