Thursday, March 3, 2016

With Donald Trump's Looming Election, Americans are Fleeing America

While millions of refugees seek asylum from war zones such as Syria and Iraq into Europe and around the world, suddenly America has experienced a flood of refugees seeking safety from the United States into countries such as Canada, the Netherlands, Mexico, and the Central American and Latin American regions.  Embassies from around the world, including those in the Middle East, have encountered a tidal wave of visa requests.

"We need to get south before the wall goes up and then we get trapped," said Jed Springmyer, policy analyst at Washington's most prestigious think tank, TD Think Tank.  "Trump is basically saying we're in wartime before there's a war, which means there's a war.  I want to get my family to safety."

The U.S. presidential elections are only months away, but many of the refugees feel that they need to escape.

"Listen, if I never see another 7-11 in my life but my family is safe, that's what's gotta happen," said Ned Bland, owner Bland Enterprises. "This guy is off the hook.  We'll go back when I think we're safe."

We contacted a number of embassies for their reaction to the sudden exodus.  "We're swamped," said chief of immigration Washington Darling at the Embassy of Togo. "It's got to be really bad over there that people want to move to Togo."

It is estimated that as many as 100 million Americans will be seeking asylum in the next 10 months, with the biggest flood of refugees happening in November, 2016.

Asked about capacity for such an exodus, transportation industry expert, Wiemar Replik, said this: "We're going to have to get some bigass ships out of mothballs for this.  This can't be done with teeny little airplanes and tinky cruise liners with slot machines."

Was the massive escape of Americans from the country in the candidate's playbook?  "We figured that only the purist of the breeds would stick with us," said J.J. Gerbils, Sanitation Advisor to Trump. "Unfortunately, that means a lot of people are out of here."

"I wouldn't call this panic.  It's more like beginning panic," said Dick Himmler, Trump special operations adviser.  "Things will calm down soon enough."

Benito Mussolini, former fascist leader of Italy in WWII, said this: "OK. First of all he's the Don.  Capire? Respect, first of all.  Disenfranchised people always want a leader that's like a gun in their hand.  They like him, it's a perfect fit."

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